It takes a strong person to forgive
If I asked you to interpret what the above meant, how many of you would actually tell me that ‘you must forgive others’ or that ‘not everyone can forgive others’. What’s the common interpretation? Ah, yes, ‘forgiving OTHERS’. Let me tell you that, that interpretation is WRONG! ABSOLUTELY WRONG!
See the thing is, we are so used to associating the word ‘forgiveness’ with ‘others’. Has it occurred to you that you must first start with yourself before decide to forgive others? I’m not saying that the concept of forgiveness revolves around oneself alone but rather, that’s the starting point. What I am saying is this –
You must learn to forgive yourself first
When I first thought about the art of forgiving oneself, my immediate question was ‘why do I need to forgive myself? I mean, What did I do to me?’ But that’s the thing my dear reader, you do those countless things that make you sad, angry and disappointed in yourself and you instead of forgiving, hate yourself, feel stupid and vent about it all day long.
Was it the grass that you said you’d lawn this morning but you slept through til midday? Or was it an ex that you told yourself you wouldn’t cry over but finished the entire chocolate bar? Or was it that you told yourself you’d go to the gym this afternoon but ordered pizza for dinner instead?
Point is, you’ve done it, forgive yourself and move on! Now, forgiving yourself doesn’t mean you become oblivious to your mistakes. You must learn from it and then move on. There’s no point on crying over spilt milk anyway, right? So here’s the correct formula –
Mistake Done —> Learn from it —> Forgive Yourself —> Move on
Why am I telling you this? Because forgiving your ownself is hard! Esp because forgiving your ownself is like saying ‘that’s okay for being stupid, just don’t do it next time’, except, you really mustn’t do it the next time! The thing is, once your forgive yourself, few things happen –
- You literally grow and achieve peace within yourself
- You no longer care how people mock you because the person you caused grieve to (which is yourself) has forgiven you
- It’s the stepping stone to being to able to forgive others
After I tried this technique, I somewhat became an even better person. It makes you kinda rationalize why people did what they did and so, forgiving others becomes an easier task. Okay I’ve said too much for today. I’d like to hear from you if you have anything on the topic.
Recapping the main point, you must forgive yourself 🙂